Wednesday 24 September 2014

What we desire most, we cannot simply achieve. There, sacrifices have to be made. In many ways, it's comical, how throughout history, people fight and die in vain for the same things. Money, freedom and equality. We don't learn-- we NEVER learn. Though the latter may seem to be for the greater good, they are not-- not in the slightest way-- for their roots also stem from the damnable seed of selfishness that bloom within every single one of us. Ask yourself then, why are people willing to shed blood for money? Because of the power that money brings? If so, ask yourself again, why do we strive to break free from whatever that's holding us down? So we could become more, do more and live however we want to, be our own masters? Isn't that the same as being greedy, yearning for money to be powerful, to rule? Equality, too. It doesn't exist, and it never will, for equality doesn't mean justice. It's just another excuse to be acknowledged.

If the world is indeed a stage and we are all but muppets and fools, then I curse the puppet master who wields the strings. It is not funny. It's not-- that's what I have to tell myself, anyway. Even so, I find it hard to keep my inappropriate laughter to myself. Ridiculous, absurd and undoubtedly maddening. It seems as if it is embedded into our very nature that we strive for what we know will never be ours. It's sickening. At the end of the day, I ask myself again, why... Why do I have to be so selfish? You too.

Because nobody will have it any other way than their own. I will not compromise my pride, nor will you. An understanding cannot be achieved when neither wishes to point the gun at themselves. What for do you fight with a being who will bring about its own destruction? Violence is not always the answer, but then, peace does not exist. Then, we follow in the footsteps of the other, which is to use their own weapons and weaknesses against them, the way they do to us. How... However is that productive..? Another man's meat is another man's poison. And though I prefer my own poison to your meat, your taking to my preference is ludicrous. 

If I am to admit defeat... That is very unlikely. The same seed of selfishness and pride dwells within me, and it is forever blooming, all the more so with the extra raging fertilizer that's been supplied to it in the recent months. If pain is a sense of glory, then I would kneel before my own flag and shed plain tears of defeat of yet another loss that I have brought upon myself. I am never satisfied, that much I know. When you can't love right, you're going to be the only one left-- that, I know too well. But I don't mind. Solitude, and the touch of the soulless breeze could be so comforting, yet intimidating at the same time. At that, I shall shudder as my regrets come by me once more. 

The same problem persists. Neither will let their guard down. 

Suffer on... Suffer on... or end it, only to get caught up in the cycle anew. 

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