I Messed Up AGAIN

You know. This always happens. I always get so upset cause my own stupid self that I hate so damn much. I take that anger out on some idiot who is willing to let me stab. No matter how many times I throw thorny roses on that idiot... That person... That guy... He just pisses me off... He... Never... Understands...

That is why........... He never helps.

In a way. He helps. By making me pissed off and giving up, I feel better.

I feel much better. Compared to just now. That's cause I gave up. Like usual.

The feeling when anger turns into tears. THAT JUST SUCKS. At least I can conclude that I am not a violent person.

What else can I write here. There's nothing NOT personal these days. My life has gotten even MORE messed up. And like always, it has NOTHING to do with YOU. NOTHING AT ALL. Don't go assuming like you did and always do, my problems never had anything to do with you. Maybe they did. Maybe I'm lying. Cause I don't wanna admit that I'm wrong, and that you're right.

I hate you.

I hate you.

I hate you.

I don't know. I just felt like it.

I hate everything about you. You hate everything about me. So why do you... LOVE ME?! A song by Three Days Grace. Nothing personal. Just felt like screaming the song out. I think I'll do that when I bury my face in my pillow later. I'll probably have to dry the pillow afterwards.

Ah. Friends... Really? I just don't feel like I belong anywhere anymore.

Well. I think I'll just go be one of those emo people that hides in a corner everyday... That life... What so different from the one I'm having now...

... And only when I start to think about it... I, hate EVERYTHING about you. You, hate EVERYTHING about me. Why... Do I... LOVE YOU?!...