I Welcome You to Bore Yourself to Sleep

It's almost 1A.M now, another five minutes, and it'll be the start of...

HAHAHA

My sisters just ran in, panting, scared. We just watched Curse of Chucky, another installment of the ever so disturbing story of the ginger killer doll who ruined everyone's god damned childhood! My doll phobia started because of that bastard. Anyway, the two brats were having a midnight snack, but they heard weird noises coming from the bathroom... Ooh, how convenient! In the movie, Chucky hid in the bathroom. Meh. I hear my sisters running up the stairs. They're going to have a sleepless night, I'm sure.

Sigh. It's about time I sleep. Band practice tomorrow. I feel incomplete though, that's why I can't bring myself to turn off the lights and set my Goodnight's Sleep Alarm to monitor my sleeping activity. Just in case you were wondering, I'm not some rich ass bitch who bought a thousand-dollar sleep monitor because I wanna see how I sleep, I SIMPLY DOWNLOADED IT FOR FREE AT THE PLAY STORE!

I feel incomplete. Yes.

There is a fine line between obsession and love. Damn. Can that line be any more vague?! I daresay I am not obsessed. No. At least I don't send him t-shirts that read "back off, he's mine!" Funny story: he's not even mine in the first place. Hah! Life's like that. It will always be flawed, never will it be perfect. Except for the few weeks we hope to spend together SOMEDAY.

I miss him.

I wonder who I'm talking to now? Myself? You? Probably you, dear reader, unless you are the "him" that I am referring to, otherwise, I guess I'm addressing you directly. I have nobody particular in mind. I'm missing someone, yes,  but that's not the point. I wonder who I'm writing this to, specifically. The ex that still remains as a close friend? The person who is far away that I call friend? The busy friend with two part-time jobs to numb himself? The sister of the person who is on my mind? Perhaps, even his mother? Or just you, a plain passerby that somehow stumbled upon this life that nobody really ever cares about-- there are a few exceptions, of course.

Writing like this... I feel disconnected with my work. I can be whoever I wish to be. I can't lie with my handwriting, but I sure as hell can with this digital font. I feel like another passerby, reading the words of a stranger.

I am blogging from my Android.

I should sleep soon.

I should study.

...

Sigh.

Ignorance is a choice. We sure as hell know what I chose!

In less than three weeks, I will have to walk into the examination hall and face it all. There's only one chance for this shit. Not technically, but whatever.

My hair is still damp. I feel it's getting thinner again, my hair. Am I really that stressed? All I do is watch movies and Skype all day! As if my last episode of alopecia areata isn't enough, my body wants me to go full bald? Come on! I just got the hair back! Now I'm paranoid and won't stop feeling my scalp. The last time I came across my bald spot was during additional mathematics class, right after I came back from Australia. Played with my hair cause I didn't understand anything! Surprise surprise! You have no hair!

... Ended up writing far more than I should have.

I lack motivation. Please, help me.

That's it. My sleeping schedule is still messed up.

Goodnight. Weltrusten.

Yes, I said it in Dutch to my phone and my phone understood me! Gonna sleep in peace.

Holidays Turn Me into a Zombie Otaku

I think I’ll just do what I do best. Write. Hm. Although, I think it has become a rather serious problem for  me, writing, it’s like I’m obsessed with it. I know very well that isn’t the case, since I sometimes complain about it, but still, it’s the only thing I can think of in situations like this where I feel alone in a sort of comforting yet somewhat awkward silence.

Should I write a letter to you?

I’m writing, on my computer and also yours .  It’s kind of frustrating, that I see almost every word with  a jagged red line underneath it. After all, I’m writing in a language that’s not set as the laptop’s default language so I guess it’s understandable that it keeps highlighting my “mistakes”.

I have no idea what I’m doing actually. I have access to your computer, yet I’m just here, writing? I can write on my own laptop, or even in my journal, so why am I doing it here? I have no  God damned idea. Okay, I admit, I was going to fill this page with sweet words, write a love letter to you so that when you come back, you’d see my surprise but I guess my plan backfired. Yeah, typical.

All these Dutch words on your screen looks fascinating though. Sticky notes are plaknotities—very cute. I wonder if you’re having a hard time reading this, since most of the words are underlined; it looks like a poorly written highschool essay by a three-year-old! Ah, that’s better! Changed the font size from 11 to 12!

I want to write you a poem, but nothing seems to be twinkling in my head right now. All I can think of is the crap I’m putting down as each second floats by.

This is a rather creepy software, allowing us to access each other’s computer like this with just a mere click of the Mouse! I browsed through the pictures, your music library and videos folder. I don’t dare click on anything else, since I’m afraid I might end up screwing things up. I ended up here with the romantic idea of leaving you a letter after rummaging through your libraries. Yes, yes, this isn't one bit romantic, I know. Heck, I might even post it on my blog! If you allow me, of course; after all, this was supposed to be a letter for YOU! Now, wtih almost every word underlined, I really can’t tell if I made any mistakes.

The Sami is online. Whut? Since when did I have a contact named The Sami. Did Ladybird change his name? Then, I realized, The Sami is YOUR contact.

Sorry hon, this little note isn't romantic at all… Did I just say “little note”? This is no note… This is one long ass piece of my mind! The human brain is a wonderful thing, it can come up with so much crap when it’s not occupied and when you need it to process critical thoughts, it comes up with this: poop.

I whip my hair back and forth… Sorry. I used conditioner on it just now and it’s just really soft now; couldn't resist.

***

Yeah, I typed that on someone else's computer.

What do you know? It's a quarter past two in the morning and I'm still in front of my laptop! This is why I don't watch anime. Once I start, I don't stop! I guess the two-week break turned me into this zombie otaku again... 

Earlier today, I had a little chat about anime, and it made me realize how forgetful I actually am! I said I've never watched Fate/Zero before, but then, in the back of mind, a plot unfolded and scenes from the anime I don't remember watching flashed through like shooting stars, so I Googled Fate/Zero. I realized... OMG, I've watched it before! I was not very pleased with myself and it bugged me for a good while, that I forgot watching it. I frowned, wondering just when the heck did I watch Fate/Zero! After I finish this post, I'll look through my old blog posts that have the anime tag on them. Hopefully, I'll find something! I never fail to visit bloggie whenever I'm in otaku mode~ It just adds to the late-night-I-should-get-a-life feeling. 

Right now, I'm watching To Aru Kagaku no Railgun S. Jenson suggested the anime, and yes, things are getting pretty interesting in this season! I expected more, but I'm not gonna complain since I sorta like it. Fufufu. Once in a while, I call out Kuroko's name~ 

I wonder if I should read some manga... I never really did have patience with them. I abandoned Ao no Exorcist, Jigoku Shoujo, Petshop of Horrors, some yaoi manga and even the one I used to translate! I'm just horrible really, when it comes to chasing after chapters. I guess I'm not very attached to anything... As always, laziness rules and I succumb to its slob. 

Not gonna think about that.

I would love some ramen and green tea. Man... I haven't had tea in a while. Oishi brand green tea is making me miss Thailand a lot... I CAN'T WAIT TO BUY EVERY GENMAI FLAVORED OISHI GREEN TEA AT SEVEN ELELE WHEN WE GO TO THAILAND THIS DECEMBER!

I Love Green Tea

From Smoke to Smiles

The sounds of the piano flood through the halls, echoed up the stairway and squeezed themselves into my room through the little gaps underneath my wooden door. A Wise Bud, played by bony fingers of a thirteen-year-old girl waiting for time to pass. The front door closes-- I hear it too. The car engine yawned to life, barely resting for an hour and its owner wants it on the road again; poor, poor machine! Outside my window, Indonesian smoke shrouds the neighborhood, blurring the night. Even the rays of the streetlamp cannot penetrate this misty clusters of dustiness.

Once again, our good neighbour Indonesia's annual forest fires has affected the air quality. It has successfully proven that yes, open burning has a severe effect on the environment. It's amazing, that clouds of smog can travel so far-- across oceans and acres of land! Thanks to a convenient and free form of transportation called wind, smoke can now enjoy holidays in Singapore and Malaysia.

After a week of stopping by Singapore, the pollutants have decided to fly north, making its way across the borders to the peninsular. Mr.Smoke is almost done with its holiday in Malaysia, reaching the North(where yours truly resides) quietly last night as we were sound asleep in our beds, dreaming about cookies, cream and whatnot.

The haze arrived at my doorstep just this morning, greeting me with an unpleasant breeze that reeked of the burnt. It got worse throughout the day, and by the time I was in biology class after recess, my head grew heavy and I wanted badly to be able to breathe. I could still see through the ashes, though my eyes started to feel a stinging sensation towards the end of school.

All this smog is making me feel as if I'm in Silent Hill! Only, there seems to be all signs of life all around me. I told Sarah that we should go out in the dead of the night, when everyone was visiting the realm of their unconscious minds.

Nelson Mandela is staring at me. No matter where I am, it seems as if his eyes are fixed on me and nothing else. It's annoying when Reader's Digest put a person's face on its front cover! I always hated it when magazines featured famous people on their front page. Who in the world would want someone staring at them while they look at the highlights listed on the front cover!?

My favourite part of Reader's Digest is Nury Vittachi's column. It's always interesting and I like his sense of humour! It never fails to make me laugh out loud! In the July 2013 issue, Nury talks about what sounds good in one language might spell disaster for the other. Reading it made me realize that English is indeed a big mistake! This is one paragraph that I would like to share:

A French reader told me about a Parisian chef who in 1765 started selling a tasty liquid he call a restorer, which is "restaurant" in French. The English got it mixed up and told the world that "restaurant" meant "a place to eat out". Germans were soon dipping sops(Deutsch for chunks of bread) into the delicious warm bowls of restaurant. The English, confused again, told the world that the new dish was called "soup". So the English sentence: "Sitting in a restaurant, I drank some soup" actually means, "Sitting in some soup, I drank some bread."

Nury Vittachi

Now I finally understand why Europeans hate English!

The column made my day!

Other than that for a happy event, I received emails from Lisa, telling me that a package is on its way here to me! I'm SOOOO excited! Ohboyohboyohboy! Pictures and gifts and greetings! Apparently, she got my birthday mixed up with another darling of hers, but oh well, it's the thought that counts! Can't wait for it to arrive at mah doorstep~!

Of course, like every other day for more than a month now, there's a certain person that lights up my world. I've been smiling a lot, and I've never been happier. Call it breaking free, or whatever it is that a female feels after realizing that they're not in love with their past lover anymore.

There are many fish in the sea, the first catch would of course hold a special place in your heart even after you've set it free but instead of sobbing on a boat in the middle of the ocean, why not dive in and forget about everything? Swim with the fishes and become a mermaid. You'll find that letting go and moving on is a part of life, a lesson learnt. Open your eyes.

Seeing your name appear in my inbox was a pleasant surprise. Three little alphabets mean so much.

10. 15. 18.

Unkempt

Seeing girls in dresses, coats, stockings, fancy shoes with handbags hanging from their shoulders makes me realise that I don't know how be pretty. Why does someone need to wear so many layers of clothing, I wonder. Then, my eyes would shift down to look at my own body, the t-shirt I'm wearing, shorts and yellow flip-flops. I'd look up again, this time noticing the layer of powder that doesn't match their skin-tone, the too-pink blushes on their cheeks and poorly applied fake-lashes. There's nothing on my face either, not even the moisturizer that is supposedly good for my skin.

I continue to walk along the pathway of the seemingly crowded shopping mall, my worn Hush Puppies smacking against the tiles with each clumsy step. 

I own dresses. A good deal of them. They're comfortable, and I would wear them whenever I get the chance to so I'd feel like a pretty girl. Still, they don't look as good on me because I haven't the slightest idea of how to compliment them. I'd put on a dress, but that's it, nothing more; no coat, no statement necklace. The same dress would look a thousand times better on another girl... 

I'm bad at this-- being pretty, catching the hearts of everyone that pass me by. Don't talk about strangers, I can't even get the attention of people I've known for years! It's not a bad thing, considering the fact that I'm someone who likes being in the shadows. 

Fancy shoes, huh? I own two pairs of flip-flops, two pairs of sandals, some three pairs of sneakers, a pair of running shoes and a few girly shoes which I don't even know what they're called. Anyone with a foot fetish would immediately get turned off by how I decorate my feet, not to mention these legs of mine aren't the smoothest and are pretty badly scarred. 

What do you get when you pair up a plain black dress with iPANEMA sandals? Rachel Cheong Yun Xuan.

Indeed, I know nothing about style and what the latest fashion is, or what colour is in this season and which design is passe. All I know is that flip-flops are my favourite-- yellow flip-flops, to be exact.

A pin with a glittering blue star design, sticking out of what seems like a bird's nest instead of a person's hair. The hair clipped to the side like a curtain reveals a round face and seemingly tired eyes that's obvious despite having large glasses masking them. The first impression I'd give people is that I'm slovenly, poor and have no life. Shuffling across the floor of the shopping mall in a university t-shirt suggests otherwise. 

...

...

...

I'm really tired. I went out in my pajamas today, from the morning till the Sun set under the horizon. In fact, I've been wearing the same t-shirt for more than 24-hours... I slept in it last night, went for band in it this morning, went shopping at Aeon wearing the same old thing, then went back to school for band practice again in the very same t-shirt. You'd wonder how the hell a girl could be this lazy... I surprise even myself sometimes! I'm still wearing the t-shirt, by the way.

Nobody's here to make my day better, and the fatigue isn't helping. I'd want to talk... or something... Blah... I don't even know what I wrote... I don't know anything at the moment! I can barely keep my eyes open, yet I managed to write a blogpost... Ughh... This has got to stop...

Goodnight. 

Epaulettes, Buttons and Smiles

Behind every "just kidding" lies a little a bit of truth it in-- or so they say. For me though, I never use it unless every single word in my sentence is true. In a way, my "jk" means: every word I said is true. I meant all of it. I only said I was joking cause I want you to think it's a lie so you won't think I'm creepy.

Now that another secret of mine has been exposed, I hope whoever reads this forgets it quickly so I can go back to telling the truth but lying at the same time... Not that I'm thinking about anyone in particular...

I love you... Just kidding!

Totally not kidding.

Tuesday is it, Today? Half the day is already gone. The Sun has already set in my part of the globe. I'm in my dimly lit room blogging, hoping that this would be someone's bedtime story. I want this to be a happy post, something that's heartwarming so that you'll be able to go to bed with a smile on your face.

Ah, yes, a smile!

Despite looking like a cold and uncaring person in my daily life, I actually yearn to make people smile. Whenever I see a smile hanging on a person's face, it softens my heart a little; to know that I'm the reason behind that smile makes even the shittiest job worthwhile.

Epaulettes and buttons. I wonder who the hell was brainless enough to appoint me as the person in charge of the worst possible part of the uniforms back in 2012. Clumsy hands, fat buttery fingers, unorganized and certainly not the most responsible person out of the 100 members in NHMB. To add, I haven't the slightest skill in sewing and mending even the simplest tear in clothes. Back in my junior years when Home Economics was a subject, my sewing project was done by the tailor!

My history aside, now that I'm finally released from that wretched post as one of the uniform committee members, I find myself willing to help out more these days. Hah! To think that I was never going to go near those boxes and boxes of decades-old epaulettes, badges and buttons ever again!

It's no longer my responsibility, but I'm still there whenever it's time for concerts or whatnot and we have to get everyone their "biscuit boxes" and make sure everything fits. Truthfully, I'm doing it like it's still my job.

Grace is the new person in charge of those headache-givers. She is a rather organised girl with neat handwriting and isn't unkempt-- unlike yours truly. It's my fault for not calling her to help out at all when she was supposedly my assistant, so I guess this is compensation-- being her assistant. I can choose to ignore her, but being me, I feel depressed when someone doesn't like me. I try my best to lighten the weight on people's shoulders and make them smile... Unless of course, that person is on my blacklist!

Albeit Grace is a woodwind-- an enemy of the brass section-- I'm still willingly helping her out. In all my years in the band, I've never once liked anyone from the woodwind section. Especially the girls. The ones I really couldn't stand was the batch of 2010... Ugh... I hate people that were born in the year of the Chicken! Somehow, I just can't click with them.

"Aw... Can you help me with Shirley's uniform?" there was a little pout on that face of hers. I don't particularly like it when girls try to be cute in front of me, but hey, as long as it would make Grace a little bit relaxed, I'd do it. Like I said, knowing that the reason behind a person's smile is because of me makes even the shittiest job worthwhile.

I think that this is enough for today! Although it wasn't a very touching post... Well, I apologise, my Lord! I probably ended up boring you with things you don't even know about me! T^T

This is like a diary after all, isn't it? A post written every other day would differ. Happy, sad, remorseful or memorable. It's all unpredictable.

Sweet dreams, Lord Batnan XD

Evening Post

It's me again!

Sigh...

I'm not exactly in the jolliest mood at the moment since Iron Man 3 tickets are sold out. Be it 8pm or 9.30pm, they're all out. Be it 2D or 3D, full house for both.

You know what sucks more than not being able to watch this summer's blockbuster? The fact that you won't call tonight.

Saturday nights...

Ever snice that day, I've been trying to find countless excuses to go out on Saturday nights. For a short period of time, making merry with my friends numbs my heart. You won't be calling anymore and I don't want to lie in bed crying, expecting the phone to ring.

Last Saturday... What did I do? I forgot. You called, I still cried. Yes, I remember now. Last Saturday, I blogged.<

Since I'm writing now, I can't possibly post something up here in the next two hours! It'd be so boring for people to keep seeing my updates!

Anyway, I'm on Rei again, and I have a feeling that it will screw up my post again, just like it did last night! Everything was all jumbled into one paragraph. Such an eyesore. I had to edit the post on my laptop when I woke up this morning! Now, thanks to Quah, I have to delete html codes that are showing in my current post.

To end this evening's post, I'll write a haiku about my sisther(sister+brother)

Annoying as hell,
Johnson Quah; ugly duckling.
Short, ugly and dark.

Mistakes, I'm Sleepy!

***So many mistakes in this post! Already had 7 readers before I had the chance to edit T^T



Mistakes. Mistakes everywhere! Next thing I know, a person will leave a comment correcting my mistake.

 I don't know what's gotten into me. Recently, I keep making simple grammatical mistakes that annoys the hell out of grammar-Nazis. For instance, I accidentally write 'to' instead of 'too' and "you're" instead of "your"

My Facebook statuses always get corrected by the one person I'm most sensitive to. I think I might have to block that person! Breaking up and attacking me every chance he gets? Come on! Give me a fucking break here! Being friends is already a hard enough thing. I feel like I'm keeping my dead dog, forever thinking about it even though I know it is never coming back. Then once in a while, the dead dog would come back to taunt me.

 Speaking of mistakes, please forgive the ones that are in this post. I'm blogging from my Rei, so it's a bit hard to check everything on this tiny thing!

 Few days ago, out of loneliness, I read my old posts. I used most of my afternoon-nappy time too! Which resulted in a headache during band practice. I want to thank whoever reads my post and occasionally tick [interesting] or [stupid]  after finishing each post. Frankly, my posts only get 2 viewers... So yeah... Thanks for the support T^T

 I'm actually in the middle of reading the May issue of Reader's Digest. According to Ladybird Tan, it's something old people read. Well... I must admit, the part I look forward to is the jokes section. Occasionally, I find the news in there interesting. Oh, I love how it feeds my brain information which I don't really need to know! 

 Did you know that doors are the reason why we forget things whenever we enter another room? Psychologists at the University of Notre Dame, US, have discovered that passing through a doorway triggers what's known as an "event boundary" in the mind, separating one set of thoughts and memories from the next. Your brain files away the thoughts you had in the previous room and prepares a blank plate for the new locale.

 See? Stuff that doesn't concern next week's mid-year exams! I'm screwed yet again. 

 The reason why I'm here past midnight is because I feel hurt again. Anyway, my eyes are tired. Thanks to two and half hours of watching Django Unchained with the lights off on the 55-inch tv. The movie met my expectations. It'd be perfect if I had watched it in the cinema when it first hit the silver screen. Oh wait, the damned cinema here didn't bother screening it! 

 Hopefully, I'll be able to watch Iron Man 3 tomorrow. 


Goodnight. 

 Love and kisses, RACHEL

Back to Forever Alone-ing

People rarely update their blogs these days! Back then when I first joined Blogger, there were more posts on my reading lists than I could bear! Now, even I rarely come on this site. When I do, it's because I'm bored and don't want to sleep yet.

I find that this little thing we've created for ourselves, a personal online space that takes whatever we give it, have become the companion for the modern Forever Aloners with too much on their chest and too little to share with--unless you're the type of hardcore blogger that blogs about everything from politics to personal life to health and beauty.

On my reading list today, Yuri-Ichigo has updated the blog I thought to be dead! Sono Hanabira Kuchizuke-o, how I miss the series! I hope they complete the English patches for the latest visual novel soon! The characters in the latest series look so sweet~ drools~ HAHAHA!

I actually just deleted a whole paragraph because I thought it was inappropriate =/

What brings me here today?

Ah, someone reminded me of my blog.

I missed the days where I'd do this every single night. Now that I'm here again, I feel like a hikikomori again. After all, the reason I retreated here to this ever so welcoming blog of mine is because I have lost the person I shared my life with. So yeah, since my journal is only written during the day, I figured that blogging could fill  my night, take the place of the calls I'd receive back then.

Chinese pop songs all sound so miserable. Fits the mood though.

It may not seem like I'm deeply sad today because I've become mad. A screw or two have gone loose in this head of mine. Yay. Studies show that the funniest people are often the most depressed, so you shouldn't really be surprised by my cheerfulness. I've become so broken that all there's left to do is to laugh. HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

I scare myself sometimes.

Mm...

好不容易又能再多爱一天，但故事的最后你好像还是说了拜拜。

You know I'm emo when I start quoting lyrics from Jay Chou's songs. The above line was from Fine Day, 晴天. It fits my situation perfectly, so there's no need to come up with another phrase.

I don't know what I'm doing these days.

Macadamia, feeding time!

Random Rants

I just realised that I've been wearing my pants the other way around for the past few hours. Hmph.

I'm using my little Rei to blog again! But this time, I downloaded the proper Blogger app so things are easier. This application got bad reviews apparently, but oh yell, nothing bad has happened to me... Yet... If it malfunctions when I'm halfway through... Oh, it burns!

I haven't got over my bad mood so there is this itch to write. I can't seem to be content no matter how much I write or eat! My belly certainly isn't taking my recent eating habits very well. When will my suffering end?! Oh, damn it! What can I do to make it stop?! Period is going to visit in another two days or so, and it will-without a doubt- make things worse. Grr...

I want to write so much... So much... But there's not a topic that I want to stick to... Hm... Well, Lisa and I groomed Macadamia just now! We bathed my filthy little girl in Dettol and clipped her nails! She gave us a hard time... I ended up showering myself with Dettol as well... Bitch shitted and peed on me... Ugh :/

Facebook always asks me what's on my mind, but honestly, Facebook's a horrible listener so I always tell it random things like how babies hate me. Blogger is a better listener, so I give it more crap; elaborate on what I would tell Facebook.

Fuck. This app just gave me a mini heart attack. So, I checked my messages since my friend keeps texting me and when I reopened the app... BLANK!!! Then I went to my post list. Thankfully, it was auto-saved T^T

Anyway, gonna Skype now! I missed the birthday party because I left my phone in a random spot and proceeded to watch a Japanese movie. Yeah, I'm hoping to hear about everything I missed out on from a friend and think to myself "I never liked most of them" and I'll probably be truthful with this friend... She's the only one who listens. No. Not the birthday girl.

Macadamia's Food Preference

Wow, it has been more than a month already since I brought Macadamia home, but it sure feels lesser than that! Time sure flies, doesn't it? I wonder when time started moving so fast. The hours seem long, but the days pass by just like that, leaving me wondering about what I had done during those empty times a fortnight later... ANYWAY, let's get back to the topic. 

Ah, Macadamia, my shitty-prickly-lazy-grumpy pet hedgehog. I try to introduce fruits and veges to her whenever I can, so far, I've found that she dislikes fruits. However, there was this one time when she drank my orange juice straight from my cup. I don't know if she liked it or not, but she doesn't usually go near things she dislikes. I think Macadamia only likes fruity drinks. I prepared grape-flavored Vitagen and a real grape one evening and put them right in her face. She only went for the Vitagen and not the real fruit itself. Hmph. Sadly, she dislikes my favorite fruit, the watermelon, but LOVES my most loathed food of all times, the hard-boiled egg. She gobbles down the yolk like there's no tomorrow! And the yolk is the one thing that I would never ever put in my mouth! ACKK!

Today, I've discovered that Macadamia likes KFC's coleslaw! I didn't intentionally feed her the finger lickin' good leftovers, she was the one who sniffed around and started licking the plastic cup. I was watching Brave in my room and I left my food on the floor. I didn't think that she'd like KFC =-= 

I had my phone beside me so I took a few pictures~

I'm not sure if it's good for my pet or not, but I trust her instincts. Haha. I trust that she knows what's good for her and what's not.

My room smells of hedgehog food and hedgehog =-= Pardon the smell when you guys come and visit, kay? Haha, I hope that this will stop my mom from letting relatives sleep in my room! MUAHAHAHAHA!

To tell you the truth, I wasn't in the mood for blogging. I just wanted to share something about Macadamia. 

Goodnight.

Dramas Ruin People~

I've got to stop watching those Taiwanese dramas! Darn my sisters for always hogging the tv and watching them, leaving me no choice but to watch as well. Once I start though, I can't stop... Thank God the series ended! I'm free! T^T

After the big happy ending, I finally realized why all of these dramas are ruining humanity. You don't get love like those every day, people don't fall in love like that and most of all, not every one is a freaking CEO of some big company! These kind of dramas often threaten guys and burden boyfriends because after having to see all the bullshit, girls will WANT love like that. We all know that those kind of guys we see in movies don't exist, but we still do some wishful thinking anyway. Hmph.

Taiwanese dramas, they:

• Fill girls' head with fantasies that will never come true. Worse than the fantasy of owning a rainbow-eating Unicorn or a rainbow-shitting Narwhal.
• Make girls 'play games' with their boyfriends, end up sad and depressed when their boyfriends can't take their shit and breakup with them. 
• Give girls ideas on how to be a drama queen. 
• Give girls ideas on how to fuck everything up.
• Subtly changes one's thinking. Brainwash, to put it simply. 
• Unknowingly raise a girl's expectation of a guy.
• Do much more damage than porn will ever do.

The last one wasn't really necessary... BUT WELL, IT'S TRUE! Also, just because I'm writing about Taiwanese dramas, it doesn't mean that Korean dramas are any better! They are on the same level of... Wait, Korean dramas are even worse. I will not speak of anime =x I don't usually watch Korean dramas and I don't listen to K-pop except for maybe... Well... Oppa Gangnam Style =-= BUT, Koreans are hot, don't you think? Plastic surgery or not, they are cute~ If Zongxu can't grow a beard like the Westerners, then I want him clean shaven like a cute little Korean! Even leg hairs are forbidden. So Xu, YOU BETTER GROW THAT BEARD! 

I wonder what are my sister's thoughts? She seems to love to watch Taiwanese dramas a lot; that isn't the disturbing part though, what's disturbing is that she re-watches the same shit for about ten times! An example would be when she re-watched  下一站，幸福 four times. I wonder how corrupted that girl is... Ugh... Her friends are definitely air-heads with thoughts that some rich guy's son would fall in love with them. That isn't all, one of them even acts like the bitch you see in dramas =-= In case you don't know which sister I'm talking about, it's Lisa.

Taiwanese dramas will someday make the average-male population desperate, loveless, and some might even turn gay because no girls will want them. By the year 2025, with all these brainless females walking around, the suicide rate of males will grow by 101%; just wait and we will see if my prediction stands correct.

Ahh~

Another random fact about Rachel Cheong is that she secretly wants to date a Korean. Yes, before she dated her current hairy boy-boy, she wanted to wait until she found a cute Korean guy. Despite despising K-pop a lot, she wants a Korean; yep, it's sad truth that she will admit to nobody except her blog. 

I can't be in a relationship;

The only thing I can love without hate is my pet.  

Writing on a Tuesday Night

I have read approximately 10 pages of my history notebook, but somehow, it felt as if I had read a hundred pages already. I want to say this to my history paper: Come at me, bro.

Ironically, I'm writing on a Tuesday night. For the past few months, I have observed my writing patterns and Tuesday happens to be the day where I cannot write at all! I just realized that I had my English test on a Tuesday... It's all clear to me now, the fact that I couldn't write this morning was because today's a freaking Tuesday! I will not accept a failure! I WILL NOT! God, please don't let me fail. Of all the things I could write about, I chose the one thing that I couldn't describe: my best childhood memory. I disagreed with the title of the essay at the end of my essay. FML.

Macadamia bit me again just now. Haha. I left my hand inside the blanket it was sleeping in... Serves me right! She's unusually defensive today though; I wonder if it's because I applied some insect repellent or it's because my hands smell like crab =-=  Lazy little hedgehog is sleeping again. So much for being nocturnal huh? She sleeps 24 hours a day! Not a sound from the little fella. Thanks to her, my biological clock is set to wake me up at around five in the morning; I clean her poop and wipe her pee after I fill her food bowl with cat food. It usually takes about five minutes... Unless she stepped on her poop the night before and I have to scrub-scrub-scrub the floor! Anyway, I find her lovely albeit she has bad table etiquette and can be quite the grump. Hpmh.

Grandma--like always-- is pronouncing Macadamia's name wrongly. She calls her Macedonia, a country in southeastern Europe. Ah, grandma~ she calls my neighbour Soleha (a maid we use to have) when her name is  actually Zaleha.

My next blog post will probably be about the lies I want to tell, so be prepared for an entry full of lies! Lies or not though, they're all related to my current situation.

Is it the mating season for crickets again? They are really loud today! I checked my windows to see if they were shut because even my room echoed with the shrill creaking sounds of horny male crickets; it's kind of repulsive when the relaxing sound of nature is actually millions of insects and animals trying to get laid. Yikes. Let's ignore the fact for now.

I know that it's very random of me to want to include something about my love life in a post like this... But what the heck, here's the last line of the traditional ballad Scarborough Fair:

When he has done and finished his work.

Parsley, Sage, Rosemary and Thyme:

Oh, tell him to come and he'll have his shirt,

And he shall be a true lover of mine. 

 

 

Scarborough Fair 

Samedi (Saturday) Post

I landed myself on a part-time job as a librarian. I guess this is my first part-time job... But if you count being a translator at Obsession Scans a part-time job as well, then I guess being a librarian would be my SECOND job... Hmm...

I don't know what I want to write actually... We all know that I can't write with seriousness about myself because little me just isn't the practical type. Sometimes, I wonder if knocking my head too often when I was a baby loosened the screws in my head. 

I only work once a week, 4 to 5 hours on Saturday. The very kind and understanding owner of Smalltown-Books, Mr.Ing, says that I should focus on my schoolwork instead. I didn't tell him that I don't do my homework though, in case he thinks I'm a very irresponsible person... Well, there aren't any homework to begin with. I like being at the store; surrounded by more than 3000 books just makes me feel at home. My job is simple, and I get to read so many books... I'm so happy I could die! Although, looking through the bookshelves did give me a major headache... This could be a great start for me to improve my writing and find my own unique style of telling the story.

I learnt some French today =D

French sounds really fancy, probably because they add 'la', 'le' and 'les' in front of EVERYTHING... Almost everything... I actually don't know what the 'la', 'le' and 'les' are for, but if I guessed correctly then 'la' means the, 'le' is singular and 'les' is plural... I don't know... I read a French book for kids!

Today's post title also has a French word in it. Yep, 'Samedi' is Saturday in French. 

Bread is called 'le pain' in French. I told Zongxu that I wanted some 'le pain' and he smacked me--through the phone. Shorts are called 'le shorts'... I know... They just add a 'le' in front to make it sound all fancy, Haha. Cookies are called 'le biscuit'... Candies are called 'bonbons', which in my opinion, sounds really cute. Shower is called 'douche', which reminds me of douche-bags, and soap is 'savon'. An apple would be 'le pomme' and a pear is 'le paire', if I'm not mistaken. Ah, and a cat is 'le chat' which sounds a whole lot fancier than the evil creature deserves! Kittens are... well... 'les chatton'... Acorns are called 'le bud' for some reason. Ah, let's not forget 'le escargot', which means snail in English. Oh, oh, and 'le fromage'(cheese). 

Okay, I'll stop now. I want some bonbons. 

I wonder if I should take up French, haha. Looks easier than Japanese. A whole lot easier. I think I kinda get how French works already... It sounds kinda stuck up actually, the person who invented it must be a really proud person because it sounds like everything is being scorned at, that's what I think anyway. I haven't read about the French language on Wikipedia. 

My, my, it's getting late and I'm getting sick. I wonder if I am fit to parade tomorrow.

...

I lost you,

where are you,

I can't see you,

where is the light?

Turn on the lights,

I'm going round in circles,

just looking for you.

I can't feel anything,

I'm feeling with my hands,

where are the walls,

where are the floors?

Can't you hear me calling you?

Can't you feel my desperation and loneliness?

Where are you, I ask you again.

It's wet.

It's warm.

A dim light shines.

I see you.

You're lying on the floor,

knife in your hand.

It's your blood I felt.

I stand there.

I drop to my knees...

...

Well, how was that little thing I just wrote? It was inspired by the song 'Not Tomorrow' from the OST of Silent Hill. I've been playing that song on the piano since yesterday, and I just needed to express it with some words... I still haven't completed Silent Hill because I'm too scared to continue. I need someone to play with me, so I don't get scared alone! 

Stories. Future Choices. Surprises.

Recently, I'm becoming everything I hate more and more.

Never in my life have I ever thought of writing romance, but I've been getting a lot of inspiration. A romantic plot would unravel in my head every five minutes. I don't know what I want to write more, the actual love story or the 'after the big kiss' scene. The story I'm working on right now is going from bad to worse. As if that isn't bad enough, I am stuck in the scene of somebody's fiancee raping the fiancee's ex... Of course, the raping hadn't actually begun... Only... Molesting...

I want to write horror again, but with each passing year, I tend to forget bits of the style I write horror with. For those of you who read my Violin Girl series before, should I continue with a final book? It was fun writing the series, better when I had a partner-- I still remember you, idiot-- I am embarrassed to read the stories that twelve-year-old me wrote though, they probably need a lot of correcting. Now that I think of it, I was much more popular back when I was twelve.

It has been a while since I killed people I hate in my stories... It happened so often back then that I sometimes wonder how those people can still be alive. I've killed every single one of my friends at least five times already =x

Finishing the Violin Girl series crossed my mind a few years ago, but I abandoned the project halfway because I was losing confidence. The notebook is now lying in my drawer of stories, waiting for me to either finish it or tear it apart.

Did I become less violent over the years? I don't have such strong urges to kill people in stories anymore. Hmm... The more I don't care, the more I can't write... OH MY GOD! Does this mean I have to actually care to get good reasons for me to want people dead? Ah... That will be a problem indeed... Indeed...

Oh the reason why I'm even here today is because I cannot decide what to do after I graduate from high-school! There are THREE options: Mass communication, English literature, ADP(American-transfer program). The ADP is my backup plan for when I really really REALLY cannot decide. I'll leave it at that then. WELL... What do you guys think? I hate people, but I'm a people person when I need to be.

Lalalalalalala~

That aside, I CAN'T WAIT FOR LADY GAGA'S FAME TO BE IN MY POSSESSION! I don't know if  dad will get a bottle for me or not since he's not going to the US this round... What is there to get in Spain?

I have absolutely no mood for horror stories. Even though it's party time for the hungry ghosts, this year seems to be quiet... Too quiet... Ah, I don't want anything bad to happen to anyone.

I think I will blog regularly again. BAH, that is what I always say. I hope I can though, I do want to share my thoughts... WELL, not like anyone cares anyway. Personal blogs almost never get any attention... Mm... I guess it's better this way. =)


I think I won't consider English literature anymore since I gave up on Hamlet after reading the first act =-=

Sharing is caring, so everyone, I'm going to share a special blog with you guys:

Daisy White of your Dreams

Daisy White is an excellent writer. Make your way through her most famous post, 三天两夜之黄金海岸, indulge yourself in her words, imagine yourself as miss Daisy White looking at the sea and sky from the bedroom window... and get ready for the biggest surprise of your life(for those who know her)! We have to give credit to miss Daisy White for being full of surprises, now don't we? She will make millions if she directs a horror movie. Ah, don't worry, the blog has got nothing to do with ghosts... Just... 

Disclaimer: I will not be responsible for any loss. Click link at own risk. 

Fwuastwaeted

*Post may contain rude language due to bad mood. You have been told, please do not continue if you cannot accept rude words. Thank you. I am being polite.*

Oh seriously, I think I've found my twin, we don't look alike, but we sure think alike. It's either the world is screwed, or we're the ones who are screwed. Okay, I think I'm gonna go with both, the world IS pretty much... Fucked up... And the two of us... Have a whole buncha unspoken opinions that NOBODY REALLY EVER CARES ABOUT, since NOBODY EVER AGREES WITH US, and... Well, because we are not pop-u-lar enough. Unlike somebody with a name more suited for a stray dog.

HAHA. Now, I am unhappy. Well, today was... Let's just say that nothing good happened. Okay, I practiced  ballroom dancing with Winnie and got 43/60 for my history paper... And found out that Mr.Too grew... HANDSOME-ER... Yeah, those were the only good things that happened today. Going to school was a TOTAL waste of time. I didn't even sleep!

Facebook just pissed me off. Account temporarily not available due to site issue? ... You are making a bitch into a mad bitch, Facebook.

Friday... Friday... Friday... FRIDAY. I hate you so much. Why can't you be less hectic? Damn you. I love Monday more than you Friday! MONDAY! I'm talking about Monday! The day EVERYBODY hates! And I... LOVE IT.

Okay, there is something seriously wrong with me, I think I need anger management, I'mma go grab the PSP and play Angry Birds now. I hope that those green pigs don't make me angrier. Sheesh, the song Friday is a disgrace to music, if it is what we call music. Even my dog can sing better. SERIOUS.

Ah, funeral, I've missed you $v$

But damn you, I was planning on double-movie date with me, and MYSELF. I wanna watch The Rise of The Planets of the Apes... And the most MANTICIPATED movie of the year... COWBOYS & ALIENS! AHHHHHHHH! James Bond meets Indiana Jones baby! That reminds me, I think I will watch Bad Teacher tonight, if Winnie still doesn't gimme her flash drive, she'll have to go download it herself!

Sigh... Another reason why I am fwuastwaeted. Zongxu, you God damned guy-bitch, why do you have to do this to me? I can't watch my movies in peace because I don't which to choose- You, or movies. Gimme a choice, ask me "Coffe, Tea, or ME?" with that perverted look of yours, so I can ask you for tea instead and kick you out so I can watch my movies in peace T^T

I forgot... Even if he does give me that perverted look, I'll still choose him, cuz... He looks awesome. A bit old, I mush admit... But... There's this thing... I think that... Benjamin is in love with him.

A twat for important posts, really, I don't know what the hell is wrong with you people =)

I'll do this for the sake of teamwork, I may not like you, you, OR you... But, I will do my job right, without letting my personal opinions get in the way, you yeah, if you are reading this,  then you better shut your yappin the next time we meet, cuz whatever... 

My personal opinion here doggie, the aftermath of a fucking war, I don't like it. Maybe I'm doing this just because I don't like you, but... Seriously, if I was gonna go away and I hear that, I will so screw you. Maybe he is a failure, but honey, you don't really have to point that out.

Oh no, here it comes again... I'm being a bitch again... I'm being a bitch again. No shit... Shit... Shit... I said that I'd stop, I said that I'd change. God damn it. Never mind... I guess I'll just go screw myself.

PeAce.

"... It all started when I went on Amazon to look for the covers of Playboy magazines, cuz I was feeling horny..."

 14-year-old boy

WHAT A WASTE OF PAPER!

Hi hi! The week long torture simulator has ended! Now, all I've gotta do is sit back, relax, and wait for the real thing.

THEY WASTE SO MUCH PAPER!

I just cleared out my bag, and I took out so many sets of questions. After taking out a stack, I looked inside my bag- Another one. When I thought that I had taken out everything, another set of questions pop out. Ah. that pile of paper lying on the floor, there is this itch to burn it and send them all to hell, but... That will just be polluting the environment.

SO... I am going to recycle my test papers =D

But then... Won't the teachers want us to paste them in our books? Do corrections and whatever? Oh well... These people are so... So... So... What do you call that... So... So... So... UGH. I give up, I can't think of a word.

I'm such a bad person, the last test, I stuffed all the question papers into the trash D=

So sad.

Hmm... Let's see... I'll be rummaging around this bloody messy room of mine for recyclable items. I keep my soap bottles in a drawer, waiting... For the day my lazy ass finally decides to take them to the recycling bins. Ah, I wonder if used condoms are recyclable O_O NOT THAT I HAVE ANY USED CONDOM ANYWHERE!!!!!! I swear. I don't have any used condoms anywhere. For the time being.

=)

DON'T GET THE WRONG IDEA!

=_=

Ah, I feel so sleepy. Sleeping too much in the exam hall kills you, damn it. Hmm... I wonder if people really do die in exam halls. Hmm... Something I will never know...

Tsk. Tsk. Tsk. I feel so heart broken looking at the pile of hateful papers. I hope when I recycle them, they don't come back as my toilet paper!

Uhuhu, every time something like this is over... I'll be movie marathon-ing, otaku-ing, and not sleeping. Oh yeah... That reminds me, I still have to go to school, and... Band practice. UGH. I'm so lazy. Oh... Why do we practice six days a week again? HELLO, I HAVE A LIFE! Please don't ruin it by kicking me out when I go on holidays. o zero o.

Ooh... I see a red plastic bag *v*

When will I go to Pos Laju? I have something to post... I'm too lazy, maybe I wont go post it... I think I'll wait for him to come back before I hand my torn journal to him. Ah, I don't feel like giving it. It is messy, and depressing, I feel like burning... Uh, I mean RECYCLING... It.

What a waste of paper, I think I should just save my diary in my laptop instead of... Writing 4 books a year =_=  ouch.

Blabber Post #arandomnumberhere

Ah. Monday nights- TEEN WOLF.


I love watching it, I even woke up from my sleep to watch it. Yeah, I feel asleep at around Buka Puasa time, at 9pm, I automatically woke up, peed, and ran downstairs to the TV room. To watch Teen Wolf.

I have only one thing to say...

And that is...

Tyler Hoechlin is hot.

Isn't he hot? Wow... Yeah... Mm... Hmmm... I'm gonna upload a shirtless picture of him next, his muscles will make you faint~

shirtless pics from 

http://itsfashionandthecity.blogspot.com/2011/06/shirtless-colton-hayes-tyler-hoechlin.html 

*v*

I noticed it after reading him on Wiki, and yep, he does look like our famous glittery vampire from Twilight. Mm hmm... 

They are both... Hot... But... Let's face it, Tyler is hotter than Rob =D

I think I know why they chose Rob for the part of Edward Cullen- Because he is fair, like a vampire.

Is it me or are darker people all werewolves? Sheesh, like Taylor Lautner, Tyler Hoechlin and Tyler Posey~ Heeeyy, their names all start with the letter T~

I know that most of you don't know what or who I'm talking about because you guys are all geeks, put down the books and watch TV damn it!

That reminds me... I'll go read more history to make me sleep =D 

That was what happened during Buka Puasa time, I was studying history. I fell asleep. LONG LIVE THE POWER OF HISTORY BOOKS!

My boyfriend is my bestfriend,
My bestfriend is my boyfriend.
My enemy is my boyfriend,
My boyfriend is my enemy.
I hate my boyfriend,
I love my boyfriend.
What the hell, I'm so lonely that only one person is in my life.

"I'm looking at you."

PERVERT

Forget About Bras

I always hate it when I have to wear a bra, so I was desperate to prove ALL of you wrong, and now, I have succeeded. Instead of studying Sejarah for my Percubaan, I went and Googled for "IS IT BETTER TO WEAR A BRA?".

And the answer is...

NO!

For years, those lace-decorated cotton cups have cheated women's money! They are so expensive! One stupid piece of cotton that looks like two linked coconut shells cost cost RM69.90! I can't believe I even bought them! IN EVERY COLOUR! DAAAAMMMIIT!

So... The bras giving your boobies support thing, is only for OLD WOMEN. And besides, once your old, you don't have to care about your boobs anymore anyway, not like a 90-year-old pervert will look at your 90-year-old boobs.

Throw away your bras, don't wear them anymore. Wearing bras too often causes your ligaments to weaken, and causes more sagging! True, bras support your breasts, that's why your muscles get lazy and just let your boobs drop. Train your boobies to be firm even without a bra please~

Hehehe, being naked all the time really saves me A LOT.

The world today is having those fight breast cancer programs and stuff right? Why don't they just tell people to not wear any bras???

• Women who wore their bras 24 hours a day had a 3 out of 4 chance of developing breast cancer.
• Women who wore their bras more than 12 hours a day had a 1 out of 7 risk.
• Women who wore their bras less than 12 hours a day had a 1 out of 152 risk.
• Women who wore bras rarely or never had a 1 out of 168 chance of getting breast cancer.

Based on the book by Singer and Grismaijer- Dressed to Kill

See, wearing bras really DO hurt you!

Wearing bras to sleep prevent normal lymphatic flow and increases the chance of breast cancer, especially when you wear those wired bras. Exercise is very important cause lymphatic circulation in many tissues are highly dependent on MOVEMENT. So, let your breasts bounce freely like TOOOOING~ it actually helps, SERIOUSLY. Don't believe me? Go read on your own. I'm not trying to get everyone naked la.

http://www.all-natural.com/bras.html

I don't feel like wearing a bra to school on Monday. LOL.

Mashed Potato... FAIL

Now that the stupid trials for stupid PMR is almost here, tuitions are cancelled. While they expect us to study on our free days, I use my time to laze around and cook something I feel like cooking.

Today, I finally got my lazy butt up and made mashed potato.

It was... Not much of a failure, but it wasn't very successful either.

The potatoes were smooth and golden, like ice-cream... But... When it came to the gravy... DISASTER...

I thought it would be easy. You know... Oil, flour, water, salt, and stir... Oh well, like always, I didn't bother to measure properly how much to use, and the gravy turned out all... Floury... You could still see some chunks of flour sticking out here and there. My maid suggested that I add in STARCH FLOUR... To make it all sticky and stuff, and so I did. Although it LOOKED nice, it certainly did NOT taste the way it looked. Desperate to make the tasteless son of a bitch have some taste, I just grabbed a spoonful of salt from cupboard and threw in HALF the salt. Stirred it for a minute, and another taste... PUUUIIIK! SALTY SON OF A BITCH! After that... I gave up and added the gravy to the lovely mashed potato.

Once I mixed the potatoes and the gravy together, it turned out okay. The sweet sweet potato, with black pepper, basil and parsley, haa... I think I forgot how the gravy tasted. Mm hmm~

Okay... I cannot be a chef next time. And... Oh boy... I think I can't cook for my children either! AHHHH! What if they get food poisoning? O_O

Oh well...

Not to say that I suck, I'm better at cooking than most people xD and of course, I can confidently say that my cooking is better than my mathematics. Uhuhu.

My God... I have had enough potatoes for a week, even though I didn't finish what I made, I'm already stuffed. The power of potatoes. Potatoes are great for diets, mm hmm, starch doesn't digest easily, your tummmy can have a work out when digesting. Ehehehe.

My maid must be torturing me on purpose, she just told me that she is gonna cook POTATO SOUP for lunch tomorrow. Grr... I'll eat out...

I'll be making pasta next round. Hees, and that will be my second time~ First time making spaghetti was a success! YES!

I used to hate pasta, but now, I just feel like having it everyday. I can't wait to taste the tomatoes~







MemeMeRachel_1814

Just a Kiss- Lady Antebellum

Just sharing another song with you guys, since I know that somebody is TOO lazy to go listen on his own, I'll just post it here so that the stalker would hear it.

Lyin' here with you so close to me

It's hard to fight these feelings when it feels so hard to breathe

Caught up in this moment

Caught up in your smile

I've never opened up to anyone

So hard to hold back when I'm holding you in my arms

We don't need to rush this

Let's just take it slow

Just a kiss on your lips in the moonlight

Just a touch of the fire burning so bright

No I don't wanna mess this thing up

I don't wanna push too far

Just a shot in the dark that you just might

be the one I've been waiting for my whole life

So baby I'm alright, with just a kiss goodnight

I know that if we give this a little time

It'll only bring us closer to the love we wanna find

It's never felt so real, no it's never felt so right

Just a kiss on your lips in the moonlight

Just a touch of the fire burning so bright

No I don't wanna mess this thing up

I don't wanna push too far

Just a shot in the dark that you just might

be the one I've been waiting for my whole life

So baby I'm alright, with just a kiss goodnight

No I don't want to say goodnight

I know it's time to leave, but you'll be in my dreams

Tonight...

Tonight...

Tonight...

Just a kiss on your lips in the moonlight

Just a touch of the fire burning so bright

No I don't wanna mess this thing up

I don't wanna push too far

Just a shot in the dark that you just might

be the one I've been waiting for my whole life

So baby I'm alright, with just a kiss goodnight