-ReD-

Red

Red, my red,
the color of my heart,
the color in my heart.
The burning of the color,
the burning of my heart.

Red, ever so red,
the color of colors,
reminds me the past.
The fading of the color,
the fading of the past.

Red, the only red,
the color in mind,
the color that burns.
The wounds have heal,
but have I?

Red, my precious red,
the color of you,
the color that hurts.
I speak of lies,
the truth in lies.

Red, my only red,
the time has gone,
and so have you.
Time to say farewell,
I will never forget you.

Okay... Double WHAT?!

OMG... As if the last 'WHAT?!' wasn't bad enough. Now DOUBLE WHAT?! This is so... Ewww... Thinking of it makes my hair stand. For the love of God, SHE WANNA KAO MY BROTHER? Oh damn. The pain of being my brother's sister...

Dude, you have issues you know that? I'm just saying as your sister, thank God you don't read, or else I'd be dead.

And how many girlfriends do have exactly? NOW. Not counting the past or last month. Just now alone. You no good two timer, or three timer. Or whatever. Dude, you have a girl's picture on your phone, a different picture in your wallet, and you have... Her pictures in my phone. Dude, you don't even like her. You told me that, you psycho. I don't blame you, she hiao her problem. And thanks for letting me know you were joking about kissing her^^

And next. SHE IS UGLY. Lolx, said it, I SAID IT. But who cares? Those morons thinks she is.

Well, you guys are gonna get a shock for this one! It made me and my brother's hair stand!

EE SUK CHING LIKES MY BROTHER AND WANNA KAO HIM?! WTF?

LMFAO

This has got to be the worst of the worst. I mean whoa, she is ugly enough, but this one? OMG... OMG... OMG... SO DAMN GELI... YERRRRRRRRRR!

Oh God, if it weren't KFC for dinner, I wouldn't have eaten anything.

WHAT?!

WHAT?! Okay, fine. FINE! Things are like this eh? Fine, fine. I can live with things this way...

Things are just so wrong! UGH! Sometimes, I wonder, what do people see in people! HER? I mean, come on... HER? I know it's none of my business to complain about YOUR relationship, and I know your just playing around. You know I hate her, and hey, you told me you were just playing. But dude, even if THAT'S the case, I still feel uncomfy with her being my... 'in-law'... And come on, when mum asked why you didn't kiss her you said your bag weren't there or you would have kissed her?! Boy, I cannot imagine that. Nu-uh. No.

And new phone? Nokia 5800. I have to say... Fuck you. You told me you were broke dammit! And I think you still owe me 30 bucks! Damn... Why on earth did you even become my brother? And I don't see how we can be related... Big difference... Ya ya... Real big...

And there's YOU... It's like this eh? okay, okay. I wont fucking say anything. No,no,no. In fact, I think I need new friends. Why? Cause I'm sick of being ignored and hated, I know you hate me, JUST FUCKING SAY IT!

Seriously, my life has gone from bad to worse. I didn't think I was gonna have to transfer for sure. But now, I'm really eager to go away. Away from all THIS!

Sure, even if our distance is the furthest, she is still my best friend. The best you guys will ever be.

I hurt your heart? Stop saying that. You don't even come close to being hurt by me.

Say it. Say it now. I'm cold and I don't care. I'm a bitch who hurts everyone in her way, friend or enemy, it's still the same. That's just me. I'll admit.

Fine. Decide. Don't keep thoughts to yourself. Tell me the truth. I don't mind saying your names out.

Stephanie
Jessica
Shu Zhi Ngor

Just say whatever mean stuff you guys are meaning to say to me. I can take whatever that's coming. But wait, no one ever fucking reads my blog.

Sorry

Sorry. I wanna say sorry to all of you who know me. Especially my best friends, you guys know who you are. I know I'm hell and I'm hard to handle. I know I hurt everyone with words, so, sorry. I'm just gonna go away and never return okay? Besides, I'm sure no one will miss me, I don't even miss myself. When the time comes, I'll just go away quietly, I'll say good-bye. Just know when the good-bye is.

Not now, not now...

Enjoy yourselves without me.

Me, Rachel

Gone

There comes a time when everything goes,
Friend or foe is yours to decide.
When all is gone,
you will miss.

There comes a time when everything goes,
memories of bad and good times will all be cherished.
Sweet or sour,
you will miss.

There comes a time when everything goes,
loves we love no matter old or young.
When love is no more,
you will miss.

There comes a time when everything goes,
you or me is still the same.
Good-byes are important,
many words unspoken.

Today

Today, was a good day.
Today, I will remember,
A day that holds every emotion.

Today, I found out.
Today, I saw,
And I felt.

Today, makes me wonder,
Today, makes me doubt.
Today, makes me hate.


Today, is fun,
Today, is sad.
I will forget today, and yet remember it always.

------------------------------------------------

So, what do you guys think? If it's confusing, you guys are dumb! If you guys misunderstand the meaning, you guys are also dumb.

Nice day. Wow... I guess... Maybe some things are better left unspoken.

Finished my homework before I went out. Got to know a wee bit of thousand year old Chinese translation at Jessica's. Helped her with her essay, I tell you, IT IS FUN. When we were writing the essay, she keeps laughing, I think I can call Tanjung Rambutan.

There are pictures, funny poses. Wee~

That reminds me...

SHIT! WE'RE ALL SO CAUGHT UP IN OUR CHINESE HOMEWORK, WE TOTALLY FORGOT ABOUT THE COMPUTER PROJECT! I BET EVERYONE OF YOU IDIOTS FORGOT ABOUT THAT! WELL, I GUESS THINA WILL BE PISSED IF NO ONE PREPARED. IT'S PROBABLY USELESS REMINDING YOU GUYS NOW, BUT HEY, I REMINDED YOU GUYS. DIDN'T READ?

YOUR PROBLEM.

-Legion-

Wassup? Back from the movies, with my mum, bro and Matt. Watched Legion, tomorrow gonna go watch The Spy Next Door with Jesvin, Jessica and ZN. After movie, gonna go Jessica's house for Jonathan's birthday, but paiseh lo, hair cut till so damn ugly==. Never mind, don't know if I have money to buy present.

I don't know if you guys notice it, but everyone is making end of the world movies, God punishing movies, and people killing people movies. The Day The Earth Stood Still, 2012, Legion. Supernatural counts too, I think...

Then there's another new movie, Clash Of The Titans. Gods fighting each other? Damn the Gods? The trailer looks good. Anyone wanna watch it with me?

Okay, so, Legion. Although the actors and actresses are not really THAT famous, the movie's still good. It's kinda like Supernatural, except that in Legion, God actually sent Angels to kill us. But still, in both movies, Angels are evil.

God loses faith in mankind, the thing he created and loved most. He sends his legion of angels to bring on the Apocalypse. But knowing that he was to kill the baby, Archangel Micheal(Paul Bettany) 'fell' and cut off his wings. He disobeyed God, but still, in the end, he managed to become an angel again cause he gave God what he needed.

Wonderful thing this time, my mum actually stayed awake in the movie! Even when we were watching 2012, she fell asleep== and in the end was clueless. She was clueless this time too, but she didn't fall asleep.

I'm tired now. Nite.

OMG... I just remembered...

HOW AM I GOING TO DO MY HOMEWORK WHEN I'M GOING TO BE OUT THE WHOLE DAY?! SHIT... AND IT'S CHINESE... ESSAY AND CALLIGRAPHY. IF IT'S ENGLISH THEN SUP SUP SUI LO... BUT NO... IT HAS TO BE CHINESE! AND GOD DAMMIT! I STILL HAVE TO FORCE THE STUPID FAN YI IN MY HEAD! IS THIS GOD'S WAY OF WARNING US THAT IF WE DON'T CHANGE, WE WILL REALLY DIE? AND NOT JUST DIE, IS DIE-DIE... DIE.

One Word... F U C K

Seriously, next time, remind never to ask my mum to take me for a haircut.

Why? Cause now, my hair is so fucking short and I look like a real fucking retard! Applying for OKU card wont really be a problem for me now, will it?

You guys thinking it can't be that bad right? But when you see me on Monday and laugh at me, I will give you guys a slap across your miserable little faces.

Why don't you guys try having your mother and the hairdresser chit-chatting while you hair is being fucking cut? When you wanna say something, you just couldn't be heard over the loud chatter! THE HAIRDRESSER JUST WONT STOP CUTTING...

When I was there, I was thinking 'Fuck... Stop... Fuck... Shit... Another few fucking months only it'll grow back... MONTHS... FUCK...'

IT IS SO FUCKING SHORT! I DON'T WANNA GO TO SCHOOL! BUT GUESS WHAT? I MUST. MY NON-STOP CHIT CHATTING MUM WONT LET ME. SHE JUST FUCKING NEEDS TO TALK WHEREVER WE ARE! AND NEXT TIME WHEN YOU GUYS ASK ME TO GO GET A HAIR CUT, WRITE HOW MY HAIRDRESSER SHOULD CUT IT ON A FUCKING PIECE OF PAPER.

SO DAMN BEH SONG! NIAMA... CB... FEEL LIKE BREAKING THE MIRRORS...

WILL YOU STOP TALKING TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW? NEXT TIME CAN YOU JUST FUCKING SHUT UP AND LET HER CUT MY HAIR NICELY?

FUCK THIS. I ACTUALLY HAVE THINGS MORE IMPORTANT TO SAY, BUT THEN AGAIN, I'M SO DAMN ANGRY. MY HAIR... MY LONG HARD MONTHS OF MAKING IT LONG AGAIN... MCB... NO MOOD TO WRITE IMPORTANT THINGS...

FUCK
FUCK
FUCK
FUCK
FUCK
FUCK



OKU FORM:

NAME: RACHEL CHEONG YUN XUAN
AGE:14
SEX: FEMALE
PROBLEM: RETARDED, ANGER ISSUES (SINCE JANUARY 23,2010)

*PLEASE TAKE SPECIAL CARE OF THIS CHILD. YOU WERE WARNED ABOUT ANGER ISSUES. LAUGH AT OWN RISK.

THE OKU AUTHORITY.

6am At MCD~

I really woke up for MCD! WAHAHAHA! The things I do for food. Woke up at 5.30 just to eat MCD. I wouldn't wake up even if it's my birthday. LALALA~ Nothing to do, 6+ come back nothing do ma sit here lur... Now 7.30 le. I go bathe. Bye Bye.

Another Thing That No One Cares

Another thing that no one cares. Nobody cares. Nobody EVER cares.

So, just finished another few hours of singing K with my bro! What has gotten into him anyway? It's not like he's gonna enter some singing competition in school or sing with his girl friend, or sing to his girl friend or anything. Just weird, I can never know what idiots like him are thinking.

Just replied an e-mail from my dad. He's in the Atlantic Ocean, on the way to US. Hope he buys more chocolate back! MUAHAHAHAHA! FOOD...SWEET GLORIOUS FOOD... I LOVE YOU...

Gonna wake up at 5 tomorrow so I could eat MCD^^ Boy, the things I do for food. My sisters are going to KL tomorrow to perform with MPO orchestra, one ticket RM60, anyone? See they so geng, 3 days concert mehz... But of course, they're singing, not playing the instruments...

Lalala, anyway. I guess I forgot what I wanna say. But, NO ONE CARES! Why do I even bother anyway? Now I suddenly remember why I don't update my blog... NO ONE CARES...

That's all. GOOD NIGHT.

And it's your problem if you didn't see this Stephanie...

I'M NOT GONNA BUY YOU MCD... EX-BEST FRIEND! GO ASK YOU NEW BEST FRIEND FOR IT! SHE LOVES SPENDING MORE THAN ME! SHE LETS PEOPLE CHEAT HER, EVEN THOUGH SHE KNOWS SHE'S BEEN CHEATED BY. GO ASK YOUR NEW BEST FRIEND PORK CHOP TO BUY YOU. I'M NOT BUYING!

K~ Singing Night? Where Did THAT come from?

Haha! Just finished singing K with my bro. Lolz~ my sisters and mum sang too. My mum took off her contacts so she had to stand right in front of the damn TV.

Where did the singing mood come from anyway? My bro don't usually sing. And just between you guys and me... I sing in the shower! Shh! It's a secret! Don't tell anyone!

I'm not saying I'm pro. My sister Sarah is, and my mum too. There mother! you happy? I finally wrote something good about you once!

We even sang '两只老虎' for fun! Haha! So stupid, and we sang it outta tone~ WEE! WE ARE THE DUMB FAMILY~

The only thing missing was friends, and some booze! Although I can't drink and it taste bad, it just suits the place. Haha! Well, we did have pizzas and chicken wings.

I still remember the Christmas we had in 2008. It was fun, wasn't it? Me, Jesvin, Jessica and Zhi Ngor sang like no body's business. Too bad Stephanie was in Thailand that time... We didn't get to celebrate last Christmas together, maybe celebrate the next one together? Haha, Chinese New Year ain't over yet and I'm talking about Christmas...

I had fun, and I actually feel good. I FEEL HAPPY... But too bad, it's time to go to bed. Night guys!

Wanna get together on Chinese New Year? My place, and we sing? Haha. Night.

Hmmm... Mm-Hmm... Mm... Hmm...

I have no idea what title to put. Gonna write one big mix of things, better to have a stupid looking title.

First of all, my 'PRESENT' from Pn.Toh isn't that bad. It was in fact, better than I had imagined. It didn't hurt THAT much, not like how some people say it would. It felt kinda nice... ==''... So I guess being fat does have its advantages. Plus, I read that people with fat thighs and butt live longer.

What the hell is wrong with you woman? You think I have a lot time and my ink is free? Corrections? You are asking me to copy my damned essay again! There is barely anything to be corrected!

And what the fuck is it with the tongue pose pictures?! It's not like you people are posing for some porn or slut magazines! You guys fucking think it's cute? I just have one comment... YOU PEOPLE LOOK LIKE HOOKERS! Argh! What the hell is going on in those minds of yours? Is being a bitch the trend nowadays?

And what the hell is wrong with me? I've never been THIS blur in my entire miserable life! It's really like my heart IS gone. I don't feel anything anymore. Neutral...

Damn myself. I can't be thinking about THAT again, can I? I mean come on, I love only myself. And I want to love only myself! Why can't I fucking do that? I can't be having second thoughts... I can't! I don't wanna love anyone! Especially my friend. Fuck this...

Just a friend dammit.

And this always leads to disaster. Why? Cause the topic will always be brought up. And that is why I don't fucking tell anyone anything anymore. I just write everything down in 'My Black Book'. Good luck finding it.

I swore to myself, never EVER go for... never mind... If you know me well, you very well know what I promised myself. So, I guess no one knows me well enough to know what I promised myself. I'm disappointed. After everything, still nothing? Well, I don't mind people being clueless. It's the best.

Comment here. Yes or No questions only. Wont answer when you ask me in person.

And damn... Where did I put my phone?

WTF?!

Seriously... My mum and sisters got into an accident. When I heard it, I was like... WTF?! But don't worry, they're okay, no one got hurt... Wait, the car was damaged pretty badly. Can't blame it though, it got hit by a truck...

Hallelujah, they're okay. They could have fucking died! Thank God, my mum prayed for peace this morning.

Saturday, school replacement? Go to hell, idiots.

Hm... Next...

No, no. Nah, can't be. Duh, I love only myself. What makes me think I love someone else other than me? NO! WTF?! NO! OF COURSE NOT, IT WOULD BE SO TOTALLY AGAINST MYSELF!

Hey nutcase, in case you don't already know... WILL YOU STOP TORTURING ME?! MY CHINESE SUCKS BIG TIME, AND WELL... YOU DON'T FUCKING KNOW THAT DO YOU?! DAMN YOU...

No. oh, no. no, no, no, no no. FOR THE LAST TIME...NO. This can't be it. Why am I writing this again? Is this feeling called... doubt? Shit... I'm doubting myself again... Why... WHY?! I LOVE ONLY MYSELF... MYSELF I TELL YA'! ONLY ME!!! FUCK!

Sorry about the rudeness, that's why people under 3 years old should not read my blog. And if any 2 year old reads my blog, I have to tell ya' don't go ask your mummy what is 'fuck'. My sister asked my parents once, and boy... Did me and my brother get it for saying 'fuck'... Although, I do learn how to make sentences using 'fuck' from my dad when he's talking on the phone. It's better than English class^^

Okay, it's getting kinda late, and my tiredness is here, I'm feeling sleepy. Night morons!

Leona Lewis - Happy

Yes, this time, the song is for everyone who just wants to be happy. Including me.

I don't care what I do, I know I'm just hurting myself but it makes me happy. Just wanna be happy, don't stop me!

Don't Take What I Write TOO Seriously

Seriously, come on, when I say 'bitch' it doesn't have to be the original meaning of it, and what they do. You don't get it, do you? I can use other words like nutcase, cuckoo, insane. But then again, I like using 'bitch' more. Don't like it? Don't read.

And mm-hm, you guys know how I can be when I'm angry. Hey, I locked you guys out on the balcony once, REMEMBER? I don't like her, come on, nobody does. And you know what? I actually spent more than a minute writing my Chinese Calligraphy, and the results... I have to say 'Shit... I spent this long writing THAT? I gotta go get my hand nerves removed!'

I can call you anything I want, cause I'm writing it, you're not.

Chinese... Math... Die...

Everyone knows, I'm a failure at everything, from romance to studies. But who cares about romance anyway? I have bigger things to worry about like my Chinese and Math. I'm practically hopeless!

I wonder how I was made. My dad's good at Math, Geography and everything except Chinese. My mum's good at Chinese and music, but suck at Math and everything else. Did my brain get mixed up something? I'm no good at Chinese and Math. Geography, I think I can do it, music, okay too, I guess...

I guess what I wrote this afternoon was a bit TOO much, now that I think of it, I don't really wanna go to ACS. Besides, I'll do her and myself a favour. She gets satisfy by abusing me, I improve my Chinese. Although... maybe I have to loose my hand... Hmm...

Is loosing my hand worth it? I want a job which has nothing to do with Chinese or Math.

Important subjects... Die, die, DIE!

I still have to prepare my hand for the worst though. She hasn't gimme my 'PRESENTS' yet, and I seriously doubt that she'll forget. She is the psycho with the cane who loves torturing poor dumb students, it makes her day. How evil, does she go for mental check-ups now and then? Does she pass em'? God...

Well, I have no idea what I'm going to write. I just know that... Maybe I was born with only half of a brain, I'm dummer than the average monkey, you know?

Top 10 Ways of Rachel

Top 10 ways of Rachel! Yay!

From 10 to 1~

10. Never go to the money changer.

9. Learn to lie, lie well when looking into one's eyes.

8. Panic at whatever.

7. Deny even if it's the truth.

6. Always thinking of a way to save up more money for what you want.

5. Curse everything.

4. Negative is positive.

3. Do whatever, don't care about anything.

2. Eat like there's no tomorrow!

1. Love food, love yourself, and most importantly, love only yourself.

Yes ! Top 10 ways of me, and being me! Woo-hoo! Anyone wanna be me?

That reminds me, I'm gonna get a really nice present from Pn. Toh, oh boy my hand's gonna hurt bad. Shit... They should really band this you know? In other countries, this will be considered as child abuse ><

DAMN THE GOVERNMENT! FUCK YOU GUYS! DO A BETTER JOB RUNNING THE COUNTRY INSTEAD OF FUCKING YOUR PERSONAL HOOKERS!

Dummy's Wanna SAy~

First of all, let me explain the title. Dummy= Me, Me= Dummy, clear? Okay. Wanna say, wanna say. Wanna say=wanna say. Geddit? No? Morons!

I'm very, very, very proud to write this, for, I AM A DUMMY. And usually, dummies don't write, so, I represent the one and only dummy in my family, ME, to write this today.

Hello, hi, HEY! How's it going? Anyone knows how being a dummy feels like? Anyone? Come on, don't be shy, come on, seriously, ANYONE? No? How can you people be so dumb? I'll tell you what being a dummy feels like... DUMB of course! Where are you brains? I know half of mine is gone...

Let me tell you something... Or, somethings... So... I have... Eating issues, dummy issues, brainless issues, heartless issues, and... Dummy issues~ Wahahahaha! IDIOTS!

I have to say this one thing to one person though... 'Hey! Damn you, just cause you're older and I'm scared of you... I have no idea what to say... And... Why can't you just do something nice for once? You know how fucking lag our retarded computer is, SO... WILL YOU JUST STFU WHEN I EXIT YOUR STUFF!'

And here's another thing to ANOTHER person... ' Oh, hey, you know? WILL YOU JUST CHANGE THE GOD DAMN COMPUTER? IT'S DRIVING ME NUTS! IT'S SO DAMN LAG! DON'T GIMME THE EXCUSE WE DON'T HAVE CASH. YOU JUST BOUGHT A 7000+ BRAND NEW PIANO FOR GOD SAKE!'

And here is another, ' Damn you, I don't know whether to believe or not. Excuses maybe? Sorry if I'm doubting you.'

Most of you know that I'm the stupid kind right? So, ya. I'm stupid, I'm stupid~

' I feel like giving up already! Seriously! No matter how fucking good you are, I WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND! ARGH!' I will say to most teachers, especially my Math tutor, grandpa, and whoever Math me. Dad understands, I guess...

' I promised you, and I will keep it. I don't care when I see you you already got children, at least I kept my promise. Besides, I'll probably NOT MARRY.' I like keeping promises, although... People might forget that I promised something, but whatever. WHAT? YOU FORGOT, I DIDN'T.

What else do I feel like saying? Oh yea... WILL YOU STOP LAGGING? YOU KNOW, I'VE ALWAYS HATED YOU! YOU NO GOOD RETARDED, LAGGING COMPUTER! WILL SOMEONE JUST REPLACE YOU?! MOMMY!!!!!!!!!!

Okay, that's about it. And one more thing... I would REALLY like to get piercings and tattoos, but boo-hoo, mom's not a fan. And... I ONLY HAVE ONE HOLE IN EACH EAR! NOT THREE! HOW DO YOU PEOPLE EVEN SEE?!

Whee~ I hate school.

I'm gonna lose it... SOON...

Byeeeee

I love myself~

RA-RA-A-A-A-C-C-C-H-H-EL

Aussie...

Whee~

LuLuLULUUUU~

LALAlaLA~

MEmeME...MEEEE!

MemeMeRachel.

Woo-Hoo!

Vanilla Twilight- Owl City

Yes, this is again to him...

STOP THIS

I don't know if you guys know what's going on in Malaysia, but, I'm just upset about all of it. What happened to our country? Are the pigs too greedy? Too greedy and stuck up to realize what is happening? WELL... I guess this is to them then...



..................

Stop this! What else could you fuckers want more?

Everything, the government give you fuckers EVERYTHING! And now what? Just cause of the word 'Allah' you guys wanna make a mess? Burn down churches? Fuck you guys, you think that Allah belongs only to you guys? Do you guys OWN him? Do you pigs fucking own him?

Disgrace? What disgrace? The only thing not proud of to be Malaysian, is cause of you guys! You guys started May 13 1969, and you guys wanna fucking start another one?

Why can't you pigs see that other races matter too? Are you guys blind? Are you guys fucking blind? I know you guys are dumb and brainless, but, at least have a heart! This is your country too, we all live here!

Why can't you guys just stop this? Do you assholes want every single person in this country to be Muslim? You guys not only burn down churches, but you guys trash anything that has the words 'I Love Jesus' or 'Jesus Loves Me'? Isn't this outta hand?

What if this were happen to you guys? What if the government favour us Chinese more, and give special rights, and help us with everything? How would you guys feel?

Even when the government takes away some of the special care you guys have, you guys fucking start a riot? You guys think that you're all so smart and all powerful? How do you guys even think we Chinese and Indians feel? Do you guys even STOP to think, to consider about others other than yourselves?!

Seriously, I really dunno, when people go to church, do they have to worry about being burned to death inside? Do they have to go to church trembling with fear, worrying about being cooked? People go to church happily and worry free, with all the special rights you pigs have, you want to take our happiness away too?! That's too much...

And I seriously dunno what is going on in the piggy minds of you guys. Just cause the government give you guys extra special care, that doesn't mean that YOU GUYS REALLY EARNED IT. You guys just don't get it, do you? You guys don't want improvement cause the government take cares of you guys, you guys live the easy way, work or not, you still get the benefits in life.

When will you pigs see? When will your eyes finally be open? After the deaths? After the world have come to its end? After... Malaysia is no more?

We can do nothing. You pigs started this, and you pigs have to end it. Clean up the messes you pigs made, it's never too late, just admit that you guys are wrong, apologize.

If this goes on... I'm ready... Just tell me who supplies weapons... Anyone with me?

That is all. Thanks.

..................................

I just hope that they can stop it, I know they're not fair, and we hate them but still, we live here too. This is also our country...

PEACE
&
LOVE

Saying And Quotes~

So true~

I don't really comb my hair anyway. I REALLY like being unperfect, it feels me...

How many of you know WHO I REALLY AM?

Yes, yes, yes, I so love myself.

Okay, which bitch wanna try seeing my REAL bitchy side? Any volunteers?

And where is that point in my life exactly?

Mm-Hm, true that.

Sounds easier than Maths to me, besides, I don't want anyone... Or do I?

But of course, YOU FORGET~

Yea! Does this mean I can slap you guys?

I WILL LOVE MYSELF FOREVER! And again, who makes me smile?

oO, does this mean I gotta try some new un-tested slimming thingy, go on a diet, I love what I have, I just wanna love someone~

Yes, and I love you guys, did you guys ever leave my side? I dunno... Did you guys leave?

But, NOBODY likes me... Do my friends like me? Hmm?

Mm-Hm, I'm still not there yet...

YEA! To all you bitches who bitch talk me~

Will I ever find 'the guy above'? Nice, if I could... How much I couldn't?

Okay! My problem is I just feel like giving up on Maths cause I suck at it more than I suck with love...

Yea bitch, I don't. So, STFU and please your fucking self first! Asshole!

Will you guys be kind enough to do so?

It does go on, I just gotta figure out how can I survive in school with my Maths like this... I'm HOPELESS!

I don't think that ANYONE just read what I wrote, if some kind person read it, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE leave a comment, I don't care even if you say 'fuck you', I just wanna know who's THAT kind to read some thing I just wrote...

BYE BYE~

Now I Know...

Now I know...

How paying attention in class feels like- SCARY

Why I'm paying attention and studying hard- For the money, the laptop, the vacation, myself... And... Him...

Teachers are evil, beware...

I'm a complete retard, yes I am...

No matter what, I will always be hopeless at Maths- It's either you're good at it, or you're hopeless

I'm useless at everything

Why people shouldn't regret- It's no use people!

How Guai Lan some people can be- And very... Very... Guai Lan

I must study hard in order to escape this hell hole and be with him...

We use to study World History and World Geography, and because the pigs are too dumb, they changed it to only their Malay Piggy History- SEJARAH. And because of their stupidity, they wanna make us as stupid as they are...

BABI BETUL

...

Wait wait wait... I've always known they were useless

John Mayer ft. Taylor Swift- Half of My Heart

This is dedicated to my... umm... to my... err... my... my... you guys get it...

I love you~

First Day

The first day of school...

TOTALLY SUCKED

...

And you Stephanie Chong, does it matter if you know or not? Are you DYING to know? Well, even if I told you, you wouldn't know, just tell you this... HE'S NOT FROM HERE... Happy now?

I mean, come on, homework on the first day? Who does that? Apparently, Pn.Toh...

Read 6 pages of boring and sucky history? Tonight? Well, I'll do it... What? You'd be surprised by what I'll do to get US$1000 and a laptop... I'll have to get 8 As next year, which is impossible, but at least I can get some if I study...

Tuition starts tomorrow... And this year will be Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and Friday... Chinese, Piano, Science and Maths, Chinese, Science and Maths... I only have Monday to sleep... My Chinese is practically hopeless... So, I guess I'll be dead cause Pn.Toh's teaching... Oh God...

Damn you Potato!

You said what to her now?! Our Chinese grade is high? We are VERY polite? Pure bullshit dude... And you're a teacher dammit, I though we are suppose to make you guys role models or something... But whatever, since this is how you guys act, okay, we'll lie too...

Colour guard, eh? Fine... I WILL HATE YOU FOREVER! AND TO THINK YOU WERE KIND... ALL BULLSHIT! EVERYTHING IS NEVER REAL IS IT? DAMN YOU!

And you bitch, will you stop acting like you're in charge? I mean, come on, are you really in charge? If you are, I hate you, if you're not, I still hate you for acting like a complete stuck up bitch. I'm sure you guys agree, and you know who I'm talking about. And for once, it ain't Ting Ping Yen. I repeat, NOT TING PING YEN...

That's all for now, bye bye~

Speaking My Mind

I just wanna say somethings, don't bother reading.

NO ONE CARES

...

1. Are you okay? Well, if you wanna like... what... At least say good bye, don't be like the fucking son of a bitch.

2. Hey, is everything fine? Are you too busy fucking somebody? No, no, it's totally fine, well, at least write back. write back when you can.

3. So, next time, am I moving in with you or do I have to pay the rent?

4. Sorry if you felt what I wrote yesterday was... too... weird or whatever.

5. Seriously dude, I didn't think I would be THIS worried. Argh! God dammit!

6. So, tell me, the truth, how many times have you fucked?

7. Seriously, do you believe? In what you said... I don't really think so... Sorry if I'm being a bitch by saying this.

8. Well, I guess it's the other way round. I'm the random dummy, not you.

9. I don't know why I'm saying this, but... Fuck you.

10. You have to excuse me, I could be a total bitch sometimes.

11. Well, I guess everything is well? Good enough to forget? Damn you.

12. If you have a good excuse, I'm gonna so totally curse myself.

13. If you don't, you probably won't reply, and will do what the fucking son of a bitch did.

14. I love you dammit.

Rainy First Day

Something wrong when I tried to publish it... Damn... Now I have to write it all over again! God dammit!

Rainy day... I'm covered in mud^^ Whee!

Here's what I did, after I woke at 12pm:

1. Shower

2. Threw the clothes in my bag and left everything else outside cause I was lazy and I'm going back tomorrow.

3. Came downstairs, made tea, had chocolate for breakfast.

4. Check my mail

5. Watch a movie. I actually wanted to watch Surrogates but something wrong with the disc. So I watched Dead Snow instead. Some kind of Swedish or German movie. Kinda funny cause of the music they put while killing the zombies^^

6. Went outside to 'play' in the rain.

7. Came inside and wrote this.

8. Rain stopped.

9. Rain started... Again...

10. Grandma told me to switch off this damn thing in case I screw it again. Apparently, when I do something wrong, nobody trusts me. But with the other idiot, my brother, it's like whatever.

And next time, I don't wanna spend my holiday like this year. Being forced to buy God damned dresses, people don't wanna trust me anymore, get lectures, being said cause of one little fucking screw up. And stuff...

I'm gonna have a shower now, since nobody will feel safe when I'm using something, I'm just gonna make more tea, sit down and read a God damn book. And eat chocolate...

Bye Bye

My First Few Hours Of 2010

Hey guys! I'm still in Klang, gonna come back on Saturday. And hell starts on Monday, do I need to bring books and stuff? Please, I dunno.

So, I screwed the laptop earlier and because of that I couldn't write at 12am. But I guess I could tell you my first few hours, enjoy!

1. Worried cause I don't know shit about techs.

2. When I went into the kitchen to get a drink, Rufus and Sylvia(the dogs)ran into the living room cause I didn't shut the door thingy well.

3. They refused going back into the kitchen. Rufus just sat down, Sylvia jumped on the couch and bit the stuffed toy doggy. I had to go into the kitchen and get their doggy treats to lure them in. It worked.

4. I played with em'. They licked me all over, so, I was covered in dog slobber, mostly Rufus'. After Sylvia drank her water, she wiped her face on my shirt. I smelled like dog^^

5. After I came back to the living room,guess what I found out.Sylvia peed on the floor ==, and she stepped on it, so, it got on the couch too... Of course I had to clean it! Everyone's asleep!

6. After cleaning Sylvia's pee, I sat down on the kitchen floor and talked to them for about 30 minutes. Eventually, they got bored of my talking and closed their eyes.

7. Still cursing myself for screwing the laptop.

8. Sat down on the couch and tried fixing it. I fixed it! Woo-Hoo! And so, I went to bathe cause I smelled like dog.

9. I emailed... err... someone...

10. Writing this, man, I'm hungry... Chocolate! Whee! Okay...

That's about my 2 hours in year 2010^^

I bought sweets for you guys, I'm sorry Stephanie, the candy canes I saw looked so damn cheap, so I didn't buy em'. Sorry if the sweets aren't enough... cause:

I ONLY GOT 200++, I LEFT THE REST AT HOME. AND I FUCKING SPENT 180++ ON BOOKS. NOW I KNOW WHY PEOPLE CRY WHEN THEY HAVE TO PAY FOR ME AT THE BOOKSTORE.

LESSON LEARNED, NEVER PAY FOR MY OWN BOOKS!!!

Happy New Year people! Get Ready for hell!